Depression: Somewhere Under the Rainbow

There is the idea in life that “Somewhere Over the Rainbow,” there is a paradise that is the antithesis of the profound emptiness of sorrow, grief, despair and depression. What if your life has always been experienced “Somewhere Under the Rainbow,” and you cannot find the pathway that will lead you out of this painful Shadowland? The following is a reflective glimpse of what it is like to be someone who lives in the shadow of depression.

Somewhere Under the Rainbow 

I once found myself aware of raindrops on the window pane.

There was a time I only saw the sun, and did not see the rain.

            

Rainbow tears upon my face, from eyes that fade to gray;

the colors of the world I see in shadows more each day.

When did this darkness cloak my life, I truly do not know? Is there a pathway out from Somewhere Under the Rainbow?

There was a time my eyes could see the sunbeams through the trees,

and smell the fragrance of the dawn, in days when I was free.

The who I was, became the one I lost...a little more each day,

'tis the sun I hide away from now, in corners now I lay.

My prayers are whispers I cannot speak, why.... I do not know.... will I now always live my life, Somewhere Under the Rainbow?

I touched the edge of Heaven once and heard the angels sing. I am a stranger to myself, no ledge on which to cling,

 
When was the last time I saw something grow,
Somewhere Under the Rainbow?

How is it that a lullaby dream, I dared to dream one day, was only a song and not a prayer, of come whatever may?

My troubles didn't melt like lemon drops but are cast with feet of clay;

The skies that are Somewhere Under the Rainbow,  are stormy, cold and gray.

I was diagnosed with depression, and prescribed an SSRI, 

it was supposed to make me smile, but still inside I cry;

A broken shattered rainbow dream, no pill can ever heal;

why is it that they who know me best, cannot see that my pain is real?

Some where along the way of life, I lost the me I was to be,

The Lion and the Tin Man and the Scarecrow, they only frightened me.


I was lost in shadow, and played the role of come whatever may,

there were no fields of poppies, or ruby slippers to show me the way. 

Then Jesus found me bruised and lost, down a cobbled yellow brick road,

 


I learned that there is really no way that I could carry life's load.

He said, "Take my yoke upon you, it is soul rest that you need."

"My Yoke is easy and my burden is light, all you need to do is receive."

He bore the burden of my soul, and carried it to Calvary;

Only He could free my heart from its pain and misery.

The weight of life, lost dreams and hurt, it lifted from within.

I shed each mask I'd learned to wear, and each role I'd found safety in.

I am now His and He is mine, forever it will be.

The rainbow is in my heart today and His I'll ever be.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow, I am not meant to Fly.

Let Bluebirds dance amidst the clouds, I shall not question why.

To bring His light to Shadowland, that is my ministry,

to find the lonely pilgrims, lost and seeking lullaby dreams.

If you struggle with depression, and live at times Under The Rainbow, you are not alone. Remember that God is as near as the whisper of your prayer. He is in The Quiet Place and He is waiting for you.

Sometimes we live for a time in Shadowland, so that we can become trail guides, to show those who dwell there, that there is a way out from Somewhere Under the Rainbow.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Please take a moment and play this video presentation of, Somewhere over the Rainbow. Push the music player on the right on pause to stop the soundtrack, and then click on the play button in the center of the world to watch the video.